Dude, everyone knows the Queen's Brigade isn't as awesome as the Flapwings.
Oh, you didn't? Then you, my friend, need to get a copy of "The Hierarchy of Beards."
Beards have been part of humanity's hairy history for decades."Now, for the first time in wall-mounted form, comes this handy 18" x 24" chart tracking the hierarchy of the many types of beard that currently adorn the face of Man. This is a greatly expanded version of the pocket-sized Beard Spotting Guide from the Wondermark collection Beards of our Forefathers."